Note | Reviewing dating apps may seem outside of the purview’s of this blog. This is incorrect. I’m a single woman living in a foreign country. What better way is there to meet people and men (without alcohol)? As a foreigner living abroad I’m also always looking for ways to expand my, admittedly, small social network here in Glasgow. I thought Tinder could help me with this…
Tinder | The ‘I’d tap that’ app
I’ve dubbed Tinder an ‘I’d tap that’ app.
Let me tell you all about it…
Tinder is an online dating application that I’ve been using for 8 weeks. When I first heard mention of the app it was referred to as the ‘straight’ version of Grindr. Matches from Tinder are based primarily on physical attraction. Pictures of an individual appears for your viewing pleasure along with their first name, age, distance from you and (if they’ve added this information) a tagline. Then you either tap an X icon or a heart icon. The X icon is a ‘nope’ and the heart icon, a ‘like’. If you ‘like’ a person on Tinder and they ‘like’ you as well, it’s a match. Then Tinder connects you on the app, allowing you to chat.
When I see a picture on Tinder with the outline of an X and a heart below, I feel like I’m being asked, ‘would you have sex with this person?’
Yes, that sounds crude. But you’re given only the most basic information on a person and given two choices, yes or no.
- Yes, I am physically attracted to this person.
- No, I am not physically attracted to this person.
SO… would you tap that?
You can’t go back and look for people. You can’t search by a user name. People can’t send you messages unless you’ve both ‘liked’ each other.
Yes, it’s a shallow dating app based on physical appearances; however, it’s not much different than meeting someone at a bar (minus the fact that you can see how tall someone is in person and the chances you’re inebriated are slightly reduced). At a bar, you are most likely to approach someone you don’t know based on how physically attracted you are to them. Tinder is no different. It’s just an expedited process.
Here’s how it works
- You set up a profile and can do so by allowing Tinder access to your Facebook account. Tinder pulls your most previous profile pics, displays your first name and age and allows you to insert text into a tagline. You can go into your profile settings and delete or add pictures as you desire.
- Tinder displays pictures of potential matches based on a few basic pieces of demographic information you preselected (gender, age, proximity).
- Judge away.
My experiences with Tinder
They’ve been… alright. I’ve had stranger on POF (but that’s for another post).
Since you know virtually nothing about your matches, you either have things to talk about or you don’t. I find that if you don’t arrange to meet after a day of chatting, things fizzle out and your match disappears into the long list of matches. Yes, I’ve met some creeps but that happens just as easily anywhere else. The most recent creep shared this lovely joke with me –
Creep: ‘You know what I like in a woman?’
Me: ‘What’s that?’
Creep: ‘My dick.’
You occasionally get images of wedding photos popping up… why’s that?
Because they recently got married and they set up their Tinder account through Facebook, so their most recent profile pic is automatically loaded onto Tinder. That’s disheartening.
Not to reinforce any strange cultural stereotypes about my adopted home, Scotland, but I have never seen so many pictures of men wearing kilts in one place.
I’ve only been stood up once in my life and it was a man I met on Tinder. He’s an idiot.
I’ve only gone out on a date with one man from Tinder; we’ve now gone out several times. The reasons are rather complex but revolve largely around the fact that the radiator in my flat is broken.
It’s a shallow app; however, it’s easy to use, a great distraction when waiting for a hair appointment and provides plenty of eye candy. I keep meaning to delete the app, but it hasn’t happened yet.
Additionally, it’s nice to get messages or matches. The reasons are two fold.
- It’s an ego boost… of sorts. When I get matched with someone with really hot pics I can’t help but think, ‘that really attractive person wants to have sex with me… and that’s cool.’ Don’t judge me too harshly, you’d feel the same. Trust me.
- I went over 5 months without a cell phone and now I’m in another foreign country. My phone isn’t exactly ringing off the hook and that’s good because I rarely answer my phone. But it feels nice to get a random, albeit generic, message asking me how my day is.